Advice from an article

From http://www.cs.berkeley.edu/~jrs/speaking.html

 

 

In public speaking,

 

 

 

Your mental focus. I believe that the secret is in where you habitually place your attention. When you speak, most of your attention is on what you are saying. But if you've rehearsed decently, you'll have some mental room left over, and other thoughts will fill the vacuum. If you could listen to a speaker's thoughts, you might hear “Am I going too fast?&rdquo or “Are they understanding this?&rdquo or “How do I look?&rdquo or worse yet, “I wonder if they like me.&rdquo Any thought regarding whether the audience approves of you or not is the worst place to put your mental focus. It's like beseeching God to make you a loser.

One of the biggest epiphanies of my life is a fact that probably seems counterintuitive to most people who think for a living: if you're already thinking of what to say next while somebody is still speaking to you, you will appear socially inept and they won't like you. When you're the one speaking, there's a similar principle: if you're in your head, you will look awkward and speak awkwardly.

Great speakers—like great leaders—habitually focus on the right things, which means almost anything outside their own egos. Perhaps the best place to focus your attention is on the sensations in your own body: How do my legs feel? Will I feel more relaxed if I breathe just a little deeper? Am I enjoying the rhythm of my voice as I speak? (Ideally, these aren't verbal thoughts; they're felt perceptions.) The next best place is on the sensations in the bodies of your audience. Of course, you can't know for sure what they feel, but you can empathize and try to guess. Don't do it in a “Do they like me?” way; your attention should be on their welfare. Try to open your body to physical pleasure and connection.

This focus on physical sensation has several benefits. It clarifies your communication: fidgeting and misleading gestures attenuate; your voice and rhythm improve; and you slow down your motions and speech. Your focus on your body gives you more presence in the eyes of the audience, and you marshall energy toward projecting your message with congruent body language. Your focus on the sensations of your audience makes them feel connected to you. This sensate focus awakens your limbic system, while leaving your cerebral cortex free to do the talking.

If you're not a natural, it takes discipline to change your habits and permanently refocus your attention. Academics, especially mathematicians, are not known for being in their bodies. Let it be something you practice not just when you give a formal talk, but during your day-to-day socializing. Learning to habitually place your attention outside your ego and on your body sensations and the people around you will not only make you a better speaker; it will improve your relationships with everyone.